The Annoying Anakin
by Chocolatam
Summary: We know Anakin's annoying, but this is just too much. Set in RotS. Rated for safety.


**Warning: OOC, plotless and random. Rated for safety. R&R!**

**I know I should have updated "An Alternate Reality" and "Decisions", but this plot bunny jumped at me while I was on the way to school, and the idea was just too ridiculous to not be written. Enjoy!**

**All usual disclaimers apply.**

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"Master," Anakin Skywalker said, "Why Vader?"

Darth Sidious, also known as Palpatine, turned his head to the younger man. "What, don't you like it?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, the name makes me feel… I don't know, old…" Anakin replied, frowning. "It kinda sounds like… 'father'."

"You _are _going to be a father, my apprentice," Sidious smiled, showing his now rotten-looking teeth. "Padmé is expecting, is she not?"

"Well, yeah," the former Jedi responded, rolling his eyes. "But let's go back to the topic. Surely you have thought it through, right?"

"Thought what through?"

"Thought of the name! _My _name!" Anakin whined, exasperation written all over his face. When he saw the Chancellor stood as silent as a statue, he continued his rant. "You didn't, did you? It only took you several kriffing seconds to name me, while probably your master had thought about it everyday since your first day of training!"

It took all his might not to laugh. True, Sidious never thought of Anakin's Sith name. He had picked the name only because it felt… right. And he thought it sounded really cool, especially when he said it.

"Did you just pick random letters or something? Why won't you answer me? I thought Masters are supposed to answer their apprentices' questions!" Anakin yelled. Then the volume of his voice considerably decreased. "Well, that's what they told me when I was a Padawan."

Sidious smirked. "Then you got it wrong, Lord Vader. Answering questions are for Jedi Masters only."

"Are you kriffing kidding me?" Anakin yelled furiously. "I thought they were the same! Except of the Dark Side and Jedi-killing thing, of course, but still! I am a curious person, you know!"

Suddenly, the door opened, revealing Anakin's former master. "Anakin? Chancellor Palpatine?" he called.

Anakin jumped—literally—to Obi-Wan—whose jaw was on the floor—and began blabbering. "Obi-Wan! Thank the Force you're here! Help me, Master! I've been having nightmares about Padmé! She's going to die! And Palpatine wants to help me, so I joined him and became his apprentice. Unfortunately, my new Sith name is so weird! It's Vader, by the way—"

"WHAT?"

"—And that name makes me feel old! Somehow it reminds me of a holofilm about a weird blonde girl!"

"Anakin, you're a Sith?" Obi-Wan's said in disbelief. "Yeah, I just told you!" Anakin replied. Before Obi-Wan could say anything, Palpatine was in front of him. "Kenobi, is he always like this?"

The Jedi blinked. "Um… what do you mean, sir?"

"You know!" Palpatine groaned. "Oh, yes," Obi-Wan flashed him a broad smile. Then his expression changed into one of surprise. "Wait, you're the Sith Master we're looking for!" he let out an uncharacteristic shriek. "I thought you'd noticed…" Sidious replied nonchalantly. The redhead shook his head. "How dare you turn him to the Dark Side? He's my friend!"

For the lack of an answer, Sidious looked away— "Um…" –to find his wayward apprentice pacing on the floor in circles. "Vader, will you stop pacing? You're going to make a hole in my office!"

"Shut up! I'm thinking!" Anakin snapped, not looking at either of them. The older man shoots Obi-Wan a death glare, earning him a grin. "You should have asked me first, Chancellor. I even wrote a manual book about how to handle him."

"I should've tried to turn you instead," he grumbled. Ignoring the comment, Kenobi approached his former Padawan. "Anakin, why did you turn?"

Anakin spun to face the bearded man. "Why should I tell you, _Master_?" he spat. "You never listen! You're jealous! You're holding me back! You always bore me to death with your lectures! You're no fun!"

Obi-Wan took a step back. "Good luck, Sidious! Have fun with your little apprentice!" he exclaimed before sprinting to the door.

"And you're too strict, always following the stupid Jedi Code…"

Sidious facepalmed. _Oh, Force… I shouldn't have underestimated his whininess._

The End

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**LOL… is _whininess _even a word? Oh well, any kind of reviews are appreciated. Thanks for reading!**

**Virtual Anakin plushies for those who got the _My Girl _reference! ;)**

***Sequel coming soon***


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